The Calypso Chronicles

1. How annoying are your parents?

Annoying Darling? How can Daddy’s plastic and Mummy’s contacts be anything but a joy.

They are sooo feverishly annoying they make me faint.

I hardly notice they are there actually.

2. Who is your ideal Prince?

I like really, really, really fit ones.

I don’t give a toss about titles. It’s not about the name on your passport, it’s what you’re about that counts.

Definitely not one of those impoverished European ones with horrible old crumbly castles in places where there are no paparazzi to pap me.

3. What does your bedroom look like?

An after show party.

I have it interior designed seasonally of course darling. It’s tres, tres, important to have servant’s bells accessible in every corner in case you have a makeup disaster.

One with a lock on the door.

4. What is your ideal shopping spree?

Punishing Daddy’s plastic is a solemn right of passage for all aspirant It Girls darling.

Doing the K.R. with my posse and trying on loads of feverishly mad clothes and pretending you really, really like them.

Hunting out the latest designer gear and then altering it to my own style.

5. What is your deepest darkest secret?

Sometimes I listen to boy bands.

Sometimes I look in the mirror and don’t like what I see.

I can’t stop fancying boys I really shouldn’t be fancying.

6. What do you do when you see a fit boy on the K.R. or somewhere else you hang out regularly?

I do this really cool pout thing darling, it’s hard to describe but boys just find it irresistible.

I introduce myself and ask him what sort of music he likes (always a good indicator).

I start blurting away like a mad thing.

7. How do you most like to waste a Sunday afternoon alone?

Practicing my dance moves in front of the mirror.

Escaping the real world by reading an un-improving book.

Restyling my wardrobe/personalising my look so no one looks like me!